Thursday, June 4, 2009

Useful things

If you buy enough lunchmeat, you'll never need to purchase tupperware.

Forgiveness benefits the person doing the forgiving more than the person being forgiven.

Fox News has never been "fair and balanced."

There may be no discernible difference between a $10 bottle of wine and a $40 bottle of wine, but you can always tell the difference between a $10 haircut and a $40 haircut.

A balanced diet, correct portions, and moderate activity are the only truly successful weight-loss supplements.

Jeans can be worn more than once, so long as you do nothing excessively dirty.

An addiction to caffeine could cost you $2500 a year.

Television cannot substitute for parenting, nor can school.

No matter what your views on death and an afterlife, we are all here together now, and we have to behave appropriately.

Garnier Fructis shampoos actually do work, very well.

Where you were born should have no bearing on your philosophy of life; you should choose to be where you are, because it fits you and you, it.

Exit row seats on planes are like business class for those of us too poor for business class.

1 comment:

  1. Thank you for these useful things on a rainy day like this. Come to think of it, they are useful on a sunny day as well. My question is this, are they useful for theological disscusions?

    ReplyDelete

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